The Blessing of Boundaries

In the first entry I mentioned how, as ministers, we cannot begin caring for someone and then cease to care for them without doing irreparable damage. I would like to offer this in tandem with that thought: Though you are a servant in the Kingdom of God, you are not a doormat, whipping boy, or at the beck and call of those to whom you minister. Boundaries are healthy and necessary.
Another term for the concept of boundaries is "stewardship." We must be good stewards of our time, talents, treasure, abilities, relationships, and limitations. Stewardship is the wise practice of doing the best you can to be as faithful as you can with all you have been given by God. Stewardship is not an excuse to brush someone off or neglect the ministry to which you have been called, but rather, stewardship, and the boundaries that result, are our attempt to be faithful to God by managing our whole lives with wisdom and discernment keeping the common good in view as we make decisions.
You will need, in the name of good stewardship, to discern what are real needs, what are perceived needs, which needs are ones you can meet and which ones you will need to counsel the individual to find help outside of your ministry. The temptation for one who has the heart and mind of Christ is to bear the burden of those to whom you minister. This must be your first boundary line: Though you weep with those who weep, when the weeper goes home, the weeping goes with them. You have enough in your own life to deal with, you cannot own the problems of others too. Pray with them, pray for them, keep your eyes and ears open to answers to those prayers, but do not allow yourself to be tortured by another's problem as if it were your own. Part of trusting God is being able to let go and let God work.
It is also easy to be used by those who might take advantage of your compassionate heart. Discern timing and urgency. There are things that are urgent and things that are important. Do not run around attending the urgent at the cost of the important. Discern what level of investment is necessary and count the cost.
There are things to which you were called that are priorities, such as family, work, and your own walk of faith. There will be times where the needs of others are more urgent than these and it is up to you to decide whether it is important enough to make a sacrifice.
You can care for others without utterly spending yourself on them. Caring does not mean exhausting yourself. Be discerning as to how caring must manifest itself in each case, and whether what is being asked of you is really helping or not. Establishing boundaries is good for you, and so, good for those whom you serve. You are no good to anyone if you are stretched too thin. Boundaries will help you know when to say no and when it is okay to say yes.

With you in His service,
Michael